Finding the Right Therapist: Where to Start When You Know You Need to Talk to Someone

Reaching out for help is a sign of strength, not a sign of weakness. Life can become overwhelming at times, and while mindfulness and self-care practices are powerful tools, there are moments when we all need extra support. Therapy provides a safe, nonjudgmental space to process emotions, gain perspective, and develop coping skills.

Still, figuring out how to find the right therapist can feel like one more challenge when you are already struggling.

According to the American Psychological Association, about 75 percent of people who participate in psychotherapy experience positive benefits such as reduced distress, improved relationships, and greater life satisfaction. But research also shows that the most important factor in whether therapy works is not the specific approach used, it is the quality of the relationship between you and your therapist. The sense of connection, understanding, and trust that you build together, often called therapeutic rapport, is one of the strongest predictors of success (ChoosingTherapy.com, 2025).

Below are practical steps to help you start your search and find the right fit.

1. Start with Self-Reflection

Before looking for a therapist, take a few quiet moments to reflect on what you hope to gain from therapy.

• Are you looking for support managing anxiety, depression, or stress?
• Do you want help processing trauma, improving relationships, or setting boundaries?
• Would you prefer a structured, skills-based approach or a more conversational style?

Clarifying your goals helps narrow your search and ensures you find someone trained in the approaches most likely to support you.

2. Explore Trusted Directories

These online databases allow you to search for licensed professionals by location, specialty, insurance, and more.

• Psychology Today – searchable by specialty, location, and insurance
• TherapyDen – inclusive directory that highlights therapist values and identities
• GoodTherapy – focuses on ethical, evidence-based care
• Inclusive Therapists – centers diverse, culturally responsive clinicians
• ChoosingTherapy – provides helpful guides, therapist directories, and expert mental health resources
• BetterHelp – licensed online therapy with flexible scheduling
• Doctor On Demand – virtual access to licensed mental health professionals

* If you are a college student, your university counseling center can also connect you with on-campus or community resources.

3. Consider Practical Factors

Therapy is most effective when it feels sustainable. Consider these factors before scheduling:

• Cost: Check if the therapist accepts your insurance or offers a sliding scale. Many community clinics and training centers provide reduced rates.
• Availability: Consistency is important, so make sure their schedule aligns with yours.
• Format: Decide whether you prefer in-person, virtual, or hybrid sessions.
• Fit: Remember that rapport matters most. The comfort, safety, and understanding you feel with your therapist are the strongest predictors of positive outcomes.

4. Understand the Different Approaches

Not all therapy looks the same. Here are a few common approaches:

• Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT): Helps identify and reframe unhelpful thoughts and behaviors.
• Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT): Encourages accepting emotions while taking action that aligns with your values.
• Mindfulness-Based Therapies: Combine present-moment awareness with compassion and emotional regulation.
• Psychodynamic Therapy: Examines patterns rooted in early experiences to understand current behaviors.
• Humanistic or Person-Centered Therapy: Focuses on empathy, authenticity, and personal growth.

You do not have to know which type is best. A skilled therapist will guide you toward what fits your goals and preferences.

5. Schedule a Consultation

Many therapists offer a free consultation, often 10 to 15 minutes long. Use this opportunity to ask questions such as:

• What is your approach to therapy?
• Have you worked with clients experiencing what I am going through?
• What can I expect during our sessions?
• How do we measure progress together?

Notice how you feel during the conversation. Do you sense warmth, empathy, and understanding? It is okay to talk with a few therapists before choosing one. Finding the right fit is part of the process.

6. Give It Time

The first few sessions usually focus on getting to know you, building rapport, and setting goals. It can take several appointments before you begin to feel progress, and that is perfectly normal. Therapy is not about quick fixes. It is about insight, growth, and lasting change over time.

7. If You Are in Crisis

If you ever feel unsafe with your thoughts or are worried that you or someone else may be in danger, please reach out for immediate support.

• 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline: Call or text 988 (U.S.)
• Crisis Text Line: Text HOME to 741741
• Outside the U.S.: Visit findahelpline.com for international hotlines

You do not have to go through difficult moments alone. Help is always available.

Final Thoughts

Reaching out for help is one of the bravest things you can do. The right therapist can become a partner in your growth, someone who helps you recognize patterns, develop coping tools, and reconnect with your inner strength.

Whether you are ready to begin now or simply saving this post for later, remember that caring for your mental health is an act of self-respect and courage.

Free Resources Below

• Taking the First Step: A Mindful Reflection on Starting Therapy
A gentle reflection guide to help you clarify what you hope to gain from therapy and prepare for the process of finding support.

• Finding Support: A Guide to Mental Health Resources
A curated collection of trusted directories, crisis lines, and affordable care options to make your search a little easier.

Scroll down to access both resources.

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If this resonates with you share it with someone who could use a little light today.
For more Psyched! blog posts visit drsheenarevak.com

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Taking the First Step: A Mindful Reflection on Starting Therapy

A reflection guide to help you prepare for support and growth

Therapy is a powerful act of self-care and self-awareness. It takes courage to look inward, ask for help, and commit to change. These reflection questions are designed to help you clarify what you hope to gain from therapy and prepare you to find the right fit.

1. What brings me to therapy right now?

Think about what has been feeling heavy, confusing, or hard to manage on your own. Is there a specific situation or feeling that led you to consider therapy?

2. What do I hope will feel different after starting therapy?

Visualize what support, growth, or relief might look like for you. What would feeling better, calmer, or more connected mean in your daily life?

3. What kind of therapist or approach might help me feel most supported?

Would you prefer someone who listens deeply, offers tools and strategies, or challenges you to reflect? Are you open to online therapy or looking for in-person sessions?

4. What fears or hesitations do I have about beginning therapy?

Acknowledging fears helps you move through them. Are you worried about judgment, cost, or not knowing where to start? What reassurance would help you take the first step?

5. What support systems or coping tools do I already have in place?

Recognize your strengths. Consider mindfulness, journaling, exercise, spiritual practices, or trusted relationships that have supported you so far.

6. What small step can I take today to begin?

Maybe it’s browsing a therapist directory, scheduling a consultation, or talking to a friend who has been in therapy. The first step matters more than the speed.

Final Thought

You do not need to have everything figured out before reaching out for help. Therapy is about giving yourself space to be heard, supported, and understood. It’s a step toward healing, growth, and greater self-compassion, one conversation at a time.

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Finding Support: A Guide to Mental Health Resources

When you’re ready to reach out for help, knowing where to start can make the process feel a little lighter. Below are trusted, evidence-based resources to help you find professional support, crisis care, and additional tools for your mental well-being.

1. Therapist Directories

These online databases allow you to search for licensed professionals by location, specialty, insurance, and more.

• PsychologyToday.com – searchable by specialty, location, and insurance
• TherapyDen.com – inclusive directory that highlights therapist values and identities
• GoodTherapy.org – focuses on ethical, evidence-based care
• InclusiveTherapists.com – centers diverse, culturally responsive clinicians
• ChoosingTherapy.com – provides a directory of licensed therapists along with expert articles and mental health resources to guide your search
• BetterHelp.com – licensed online therapy with flexible scheduling
• DoctorOnDemand.com – virtual access to licensed mental health professionals

If you are a college student, your university counseling center can also connect you with on-campus or community resources.

2. Affordable and Low-Cost Options

If cost is a barrier, these options can help make therapy more accessible.

• Community Mental Health Centers: Offer reduced fees based on income.
• University Clinics: Graduate training clinics often provide low-cost therapy with supervised student therapists.
• Open Path Collective: openpathcollective.org offers affordable sessions for $40–70.
• Sliding Scale Therapists: Many providers offer adjusted rates; just ask during your consultation.

3. Crisis Support

If you are in emotional distress or at risk of harming yourself, reach out immediately.

• 911: If you or someone else is in immediate danger, call 911 or go to your nearest emergency room.
• 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline (U.S.): Call or text 988 for 24/7 support.
• Crisis Text Line: Text HOME to 741741 to connect with a trained listener.
• Find a Helpline (Global): findahelpline.com connects you to local hotlines around the world.
• The Trevor Project: thetrevorproject.org provides 24/7 confidential support for LGBTQ+ youth.
• Trans Lifeline: translifeline.org offers peer support by and for the trans community.
• Suicide Stop: suicidestop.com offers international helplines and resources.

4. Specialized Support Networks

For identity-based or issue-specific care, these organizations can help you connect with affirming therapists and communities.

• Black Mental Health Alliance: blackmentalhealth.com
• LatinX Therapy: latinxtherapy.com
• Asian Mental Health Collective: asianmhc.org
• The Trevor Project: thetrevorproject.org for LGBTQ+ youth and allies
• National Queer & Trans Therapists of Color Network: nqttcn.com
• Postpartum Support International: postpartum.net
• National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI): nami.org
• GriefShare: griefshare.org offers local support groups for loss and bereavement.
• What’s Your Grief: whatsyourgrief.com offers articles, podcasts, and online grief education.

5. Mindfulness and Well-Being Tools

In addition to therapy, these free or low-cost tools can support daily calm and clarity.

• Insight Timer: Guided meditations, talks, and sleep tools.
• UCLA Mindful App: Free evidence-based mindfulness practices.
• Headspace & Calm: User-friendly apps for stress, sleep, and focus.
• Psyched! Blog by Dr. Sheena Revak: drsheenarevak.com for mindfulness-based reflections and well-being tips.

Final Thought

You do not have to walk this path alone. Whether you begin with a single phone call, a guided meditation, or your first therapy session, each step you take is a powerful investment in your well-being.